Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Double-click on the internet

I had a great idea for a website, which I would host at oplmgtfy.com.  But that's way too much work, so I'll just tell you what I thought of.  It would be a complete ripoff of Let Me Google That For You, but this one would be Old People Let Me Google That For You.

[Screenshot of a Windows XP computer desktop completely filled with icons.]
1. Double-click on the internet.
[Shows mouse cursor pointing at "Shortcut to Internet Explorer (3)".]
2. Try it several times.  You have to click really fast!
[Internet Explorer window opens, with six browser toolbars installed.  Several malware popup ads appear.]
3. Close all the popups.
4. Click in the white box next to the word MSN.
5. Type "the google".
[While typing, a dialog trying to get you to subscribe to Norton appears, and also one from the fake virus scanner that they downloaded, and also a script error from one of their browser toolbars.  Mouse cursor searches frantically for the X button without reading them.]
6. Don't worry about those; it always does that.
[Page failed to load.]
7. Hmmm, this stupid thing's always acting up.  Call your son.

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