Saturday, May 26, 2012

The party with the groundhog tattoo

I had a dream last night that I think was kind of like two simultaneous dreams or something.  One of them was pretty uneventful and was really only notable because someone I know from real life was in the dream and showed up with his real face, which has only happened in my life a few times, and a couple of them have been recently.  And the other dream was an awesome action movie.  I haven't seen either movie but I think it was somewhere between The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and Groundhog Day.

I was at a party, pretty similar to the one I was at right before I went to bed, and I only knew one person there.  The people hosting the party were keeping a young woman captive, but she escaped her cell, acquired a small knife, and then gravely injured one of her captors with it, who ended up killing her in the fight.  The fight was stylized and choreographed and violent but not bloody—for some reason there was a ton of killing in the dream but not a drop of blood.

After that scene the dream returned to first-person and I was back at the party again, and someone suggested we go on a trip, so we all went to the airport and flew to another city, which through some sort of clever editing only took a moment, and then we were back to partying in the new city.  In the new city, the young girl was once again alive, and the captor she had wounded was no longer hurt.  She once again escaped her cell, acquired her knife, and with increased skill since the previous fight, killed her captor and ran onward until she was defeated by the next of her captors.

When she died, she returned back to life in her cell, but all of the people she had killed returned back to life as well, and all of those people kept all of their memories, so now they were all quite aware that she was attempting to escape, so while she was increasing in killing skill dramatically with each life, her enemies were also learning her tricks and her plans.

And during all of this, the party was still going on, totally oblivious to the crazed murder spree going on elsewhere in the dream, with us in the party apparently not having any moral qualms about attending a party run by people who had imprisoned a young woman, or any fears about being slaughtered once the protagonist inevitably defeated them.

Toward the end, the worlds of the prisoner and the party finally collided and people started yelling "she's outside!  she'll free her mate!" and handed some of the party guests strange hunting bows with flaming pilot lights and quivers of arrows.  The people newly armed ran outside to chase down the prisoner that they just heard about and fire flaming arrows at her, but no one was successful and they ran off after her and we didn't see them for the rest of the dream.

As we remaining party folk wandered around outside wondering what to do next, I started snacking on some gummy bears, and some guy came up to me, pointed at my stomach, and said in a really bitchy voice, "Really?  How about some vegetables instead?"  Those gummy bears were the only things I'd eaten in what had been like twelve hours of dream time.  My subconscious is a jerk.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

The other people eating your cake/baby/date are lying to you

I've come to notice that other people using superlatives around me can make me kind of uncomfortable in ways that would not be obvious or expected at all.  Totally innocuous comments like "isn't this the most delicious cake?" or "isn't she the cutest baby ever?" or "this is the best date I've ever been on" actually kind of stress me out a little bit.  I refuse to just blindly agree with those comments because I've made a commitment to always tell the truth, and that extends to even the slightest and most irrelevant aspects of my life.  And even if perhaps it were the most delicious cake I've ever eaten in my life, there's no way that I can reflect upon all of my past cake-eating experiences and make that determination in a reasonable amount of time and be certain enough that I could say it and not feel like I was probably lying.  ("Let me get back to you on that" sounds like a douchey way of saying "your cake makes me want to throw up in my mouth.")  But I also can't really explain why I don't want to fully answer the question in a reasonable amount of time without sounding like a crazy person.  So I just end up evading the question and saying things like "Yeah, this cake/baby/date is pretty moist," but it's pretty obvious what I did there, and so now I've extended my own awkwardness to the other person.  "My goodness!  Travis obviously doesn't like this cake.  All he had to do was say 'yeah' and he couldn't even bring himself to be nice enough to say that."

Chances are, your cake/baby/date isn't the best ever.  The other people eating your cake/baby/date are lying to you.  At least I'm being honest.  I really try to avoid putting other people in a situation where they feel like they have to lie to me for any reason; I just think that most people probably don't have any problem at all with telling these sorts of minor lies so it doesn't bother them.