I woke up about three hours late for my flight to Nebraska on Tuesday, about thirty minutes before the arrival of the bus I planned to take to the airport. Luckily, Jason woke me up and I hopped in the car, drove to work to park, and then hurried to the bus stop as quickly as I could. I made it there a minute or two late, but the bus was picking up a large number of people so I managed to be the last one to board it before it left, tired, sweaty, and unshowered.
While waiting in the terminal for my flight, I started hearing this annoying dog whimpering sound. It went on for several minutes, occasionally interrupted by yipping, and then back to more whimpering. I thought to myself that if that dog was going to be on my flight it was going to get a swift punch in the face. Then I started hearing the people around me talking about it—apparently it belonged to an elderly woman who was indeed heading to Minneapolis with me. Great.
I heard from the other people that she was going to be on row 17. How they knew this I'm not sure, but it turned out to be mostly accurate. I passed by row 17 and didn't see anyone, but it didn't matter too much anyway since I was all the way back in row 44. After ages of waiting for people to incorrectly and inefficiently stow their overhead luggage, I made it back to my seat to find it occupied. A nearby flight attendant explained that they had moved me to... row 20. Ugh.
So after another eon, I made it to my new seat at row 20, and the dog was indeed there right in front of me. But no elderly woman. The dog was still whimpering and yipping. After five minutes of that I was strongly considering plan A of punching the dog in the face. Finally a flight attendant turned to us and said "just a moment, folks" and left to first class. He came back a minute later dragging an irritated and confused elderly woman, and he told her that she was now sitting in coach, and if the dog didn't stay quiet it was going in a closet. There was a collective sigh of relief.
My mind still boggles at the idea of someone buying a first-class ticket for theirself and another coach ticket for their unattended dog. The woman still received her first-class amenities in her new coach seat, and the dog received plenty of pretzels and water. The vindictive part of me is pretty happy that this extremely inconsiderate person was downgraded in her seating, though all things considered, I'd have preferred just to have not had to hear that dog bark for an hour.