I know I just posted a couple things from last night, but this one is important...
Today at lunch, one of my coworkers suddenly exclaimed, "Holy wow! Did you guys see that? A bird just flew off the roof, shit on that table over there, and then flew back! What an asshole bird! Haha!" We all looked over, and saw a table of confused-looking men, which seemed to verify the story.
We continued eating for another ten minutes ago, and then all of a sudden the guy to my right exploded in a shower of bird crap. The bird had returned to exact his revenge on the man who called him an asshole. Except he doesn't have very good aim... his real target was one guy over.
We quickly headed inside after that.