Monday, December 5, 2005

A bold statement

This morning I was at my desk helping a coworker investigate an issue he was running into. At one point as I turned around while he was stretching, I was greeted by the large Lifestyles Condoms logo on his boxers. I thought to myself later that wearing any kind of condom apparel is a somewhat bold statement, never mind that out of every guy I work with, this one would be just about the last one I'd expect to see wearing prophylactic-branded underwear, being a pretty quiet, conservative Christian type.

But, that aside, I later wondered, what kind of person would wear, say, a Durex T-shirt? This turned out to be an amusing brainstorming exercise.

One guy who wears a Durex T-shirt is an ass. He wants everyone to know that he's having sex, and so much in fact that he gets free stuff from condom companies. As interested as he is in sex, it doesn't really matter if he's having any or not; what matters is that everyone around him thinks he is. I knew many copies of this guy throughout high school and a few in middle school and college.

One girl who wears a Durex T-shirt is a slut. She enjoys the attention that wearing a shirt that advertises a condom company would bring, more than the reputation. She wouldn't wear it very often, because it's not very revealing, but if there were ever a way to periodically remind others that she enjoys sex, this is it. A variation of this girl is the girl who isn't that interested in sex, but still enjoys the attention that the shirt would bring her.

Another guy who wears a Durex T-shirt just really likes free clothing. He's got three dozen shirts in his dresser that advertise products, services, or brands of some sort. It fits, and it fits the very low requirements of covering his nudity, and therefore it made it into his permanent wardrobe rotation. I see so many of this guy at work that it almost makes me cry a little. Not a day goes by that I don't see people wearing Windows shirts, SharePoint jackets, Office hats, and Microsoft coats. I've got about a dozen Microsoft-related shirts so far, and there's no sign of them stopping anytime soon.

Those are the people who I think would wear a condom shirt. They're all sterotypes, and I really think that stereotypes are the people most likely to wear something that blatantly advertises a condom company. Boxers are one thing; people aren't normally going to be seeing those. But a shirt is a public statement. I don't wear my Microsoft shirts or my pile of shirts or my Guild Wars shirt for the same reason that I think that a person wearing a condom shirt does.

That said, I don't know if I've seen a person wearing a shirt advertising a condom company in many years.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

There's a guy at my church who shows up every couple months or so wearing a Trojan shirt.