Saturday, May 7, 2005

Dildos and gum

Yes, you read that correctly.

So, on the way to Hitchhiker's Guide tonight, I was concocting a particularly improbable scenario with the help of a friend, in which there is a dildo store that also has cheap gum. It would be run by a weird elderly couple, and it would be right next to the 7-11. People who were disgusted by the prices of gum at the 7-11 could go next door and buy it from the dildo store where it was less expensive. If someone saw you there and looked at you funny, you could just flash a pack and say, "I just went in for gum." Middle school boys would lock themselves in the bathroom and chew gum.

Well, we didn't flesh out the story any more than that. I guess you have to fill in the details yourself. Right now I'm imagining something that looks like a locally-owned hardware store or bait shop, with the old woman in front yelling back to her husband in the stockroom, "honey, we got any more-a those ten-inchers back there?"

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