Monday, June 9, 2008

Airport security

I dreamed that I was in an airport heading back home after visiting my family over Christmas. (This was not the Lincoln or Omaha airports; a made-up one.) They had changed the security procedures so that the first scans were all on the honor system, and then there was a final scan that actually mattered that was just like the "have your boarding passes out" scans today, right at the gate. I was all the way to myfinal gate when I realized that I had a handgun in my backpack that I had forgotten to check as luggage, and forgotten to put through the initial security screening. I had gotten it as a gift from my grandmother—I had two explanations in my mind and I'm not sure which one was correct, but I had either gotten it because my photography trips were dangerous, or because Seattle was dangerous.

So there I was, a couple people from the TSA security checkpoint, with a loaded pistol in my backpack. I was asking the airport personnel what I was supposed to do now, and they all kept saying stupid things like "ooh, TSA gonna rape you when they find that, boy." Most of them were on the phone and wouldn't talk to me at all. I asked about lockers or checking it as baggage, and the one slightfully helpful guy told me it was long past the time when I could do that. Then he helpfully informed that the TSA guys would be really angry, and they was gonna "rape me" when they found it.

As I approached the TSA security station, I was pretty sure that I had forgotten to set my alarm, and that it was already the afternoon—possibly the first time in my life that I've ever been aware that I was dreaming. Then I woke up to my alarm.

1 comment:

James said...

Darn, you could've totally gone all Incredible Hulk on those TSA guys with your lucidity powers if your alarm hadn't gone off.