Assuming that matter teleportation safe for human use becomes commonplace sometime in the distant future, I think that one of the first services that will be made available will be custom special effects for whenever you're teleported. I think that these will be like ringtones. Your personal teleporter beacon that you got for free with your two-year teleportation contract will come with like four lame pre-programmed special effects... maybe one where you just fade out, one where there are sparkles like on Star Trek, one where your image sort of warps and distorts, and one, uh, I'm out of ideas for boring effects now. Then, for an extra cost, you could buy new special effects from your teleportation service provider. For example, you could get one that played classical music like Beethoven's Fifth or Britney Spears' Slave 4 U while your body appeared to turn to stone in a dignified statue-like manner before dissolving into dust. I think that would be a popular one. I actually think of the teleportation effects that I would like to buy moderately frequently. This is because I am a loser.

Hey, a few hundred years from now, will people who want to look dignified and intellectual listen to Britney Spears because it will be classical music?

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