An email I received through the EclipseCrossword support page from someone who, assuming he used his real name, is approximately 14 years old and is pretty good at tennis:
From: Cxxxxx Sxxxxx <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Subject: FDA violation
My name is Cxxxxx Sxxxxx and I have encountered a violation with your site.
According to United States code of international online services, you have not met the requirements needed to manage this website. I have noted that even though you do have the correct creating formats to run this site, you do not have the "Search by Creater" answer key which is a mandatory requirement. If failure to respond within 48 hours occures, this website will be shut down. Respond A.S.A.P.
Thank you for your time.
From: Travis - greeneclipse support
Subject: RE: FDA violation
Dear Agent Sxxxxx,
Thank you very much for the advance warning. I have forwarded your concerns to our team of well-paid lawyers who regularly deal with these sorts of issues. As soon as they have resolved the issue, I will ensure that they promptly respond to you via your government CompuServe email account.
In the meantime, don’t put off that paper too long; you don’t want to have to cram all night right before it’s due!
Thanks for writing,